dali48 and writing books and photographing "flora and fauna" etc...
22.01.1998 - Interpretation of dali48
You know well that everything is perishable and dying - It is, therefore, only natural that your mother has now died... - The older generation usually dies first of course - Your mother was old... - and suffering... - She will not have regretted that she has had to leave her body - You can now help her very much by promoting spiritual practice and doing good deeds in her name - She will feel happy and liberated - So please do not be sad... (Tibetan letter of condolence)
A person who experiences the heavy loss of a loved one for the first time - will probably be overwhelmed by the violence of oppressive feelings (see death means 100% stress for the survivors, divorce or separation from the partner mean 90% stress etc. - d.48), such as intense grief, anger, denial, retreat, and guilt, which is suddenly expressed in him... (S. Rinpoche)
People who are mourning themselves experience a kind of death - and like someone who actually dies, they also need the certainty that the agitated emotions they experience are quite natural - You must know that the process of mourning is lengthy and often can be very agonizing, and that mourning always recurs - Mourning, which can not be expressed, on the other hand, continues for a very long time... - In the case of a sudden death, the survivors often suffer from wild, unexpected outbursts of rage and hatred, on what they think to be the cause of death - We must help them find an appropriate expression for this anger - for if it is suppressed, it can lead to chronic depression sooner or later - We must help them get rid of the anger and hatred - and to express the depth of the pain hidden behind it - Only then can they begin with the painful but ultimately healing process of letting go... - All the experienced persons in near-death, however, emphasize that they have understood the necessity of changing their lives now - Because "the task that we have here in life is more important" - To change our lives "now" - that is the turning point. Would it not be tragic if the central message of the near-death experience - that life is sacred and has to be lived with an intensity and sincerity corresponding to this sacred meaning - would be suppressed by a simple romance with the death? ... (J. Tatelbaum)
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