Anxiety attacks / Unreasonable behavior / “Egg-dance” etc. by dali48
dali48 and menaced private tuition since 1989, and writing diaries & books and photographing in Erkrath etc. Interpretation of dali48
Anxiety attacks are triggered by stressful life events and as a massive physical and psychological threat - perceived in a limitation of action as a consequence… (S. Leidig)
Every morning people comb their hair (see image, façade, etc. - d.48), but not get their hearts in order (their true “self” e.g. by meditation etc. - d.48)... (Chinese Proverb)
Unreasonable behavior: Lack of exercise, too little sleep, too many cigarettes (better no smoking or stop again as soon as possible, etc. - d.48), irregular meals, frequent alcohol use, relationship problems with partners, friends, colleagues, etc...
For the benefit of the physical and mental well-being - you have to compromise concerning the performance of professional or personal responsibilities (see e.g. private tuition, family, household, pets, etc. - d.48)... (S. Schneider)
Adult children of alcoholics - have no clear idea of what is normal...
In a normal situation it's not necessary to perform continuously an “egg-dance” - You don’t have to constantly put your feelings in question, or suppress - Because you did, you were also confused...
Lying is quite fundamental to the family system, which is impaired by alcohol - It comes partly as a blatant denial of unpleasant realities, therefore, some as cover-ups, broken promises and unreliability...
There are very few people I show my feelings openly - I feel like destroying me inside, and if someone asks me “How are you”? - I say: “Good”...
If I'm really honest, people look at me - as if I would be foreign to them...
The result is that you've committed the constant criticism - as a negative sense of self…
Adult children of alcoholics have:
1 No clear idea of what is normal...
2 Find it difficult to carry out a project from beginning to end...
3 They lie, where it would be just as easy to tell the truth...
4 Condemn themselves mercilessly...
5 Find it hard to have fun...
6 They take themselves too seriously...
7 Have difficulty with intimate relationships... (J. G. Woititz)
Golden Snow “I can relate with this one ... this plagued me for years dali48 ... not saying I do not get attacks today, I do fall back into old habits sometimes ... I am told I do not have any lung problems but still get shortness of breath ... some doctors said asthma ... but my lungs are clear ...my anxiety attacks have all but disappeared dali48 ... for years I did meditation but had not done it right ... as I followed your blogspots I have learned to apply it into my life with feeling and with the wonderful art of Zen everyday situations have been easier to handle ... thanks again for your caring posts ...”
Childhood and Children of alcoholics and "No fun" etc. by dali48
dali48 and visiting and photographing Großcomburg in SHA-Steinbach etc.
Interpretation of dali48
How much did you enjoy your childhood? - You have seen your parents do not laugh and make jokes and nonsense. - Life was a very serious and annoying issue - It just was not fun to have fun (except as a student in Tübingen, see 1970-74 etc. - d.48). In your house was no place for it. - You gave it up. - It was not possible… (JG Woititz)
Fear of being left by that person, is the obstacle to building a relationship - A couple has always to do with misunderstandings or anger - The tiniest mistake becomes for adult children of alcoholics very quickly a huge problem, because the issue “leaving” comes to the fore...
Adult children of alcoholics:
Show an over-reaction to changes to which they have no control, - are constantly looking for recognition and confirmation - usually have the feeling of being different from other people…
They are either exaggerated responsible or totally irresponsible. - They accept everything for themselves or give up entirely, - nothing in between...
They are extremely reliable, even if it is obvious that something or someone does not deserve this reliability - This so-called “reliability” is primarily a result of fear and uncertainty...
They are impulsive. - They tend to be bogged down with behaviors, without considering alternative possibilities for action or possible consequences seriously...
This impulsivity leads to confusion, self-loathing and loss of control over their environment - The result is that they have to spend enormous amounts of energy, to resolve again the wrought by confusion...
They cancel a job, without realizing that they have no other income - They marry without having met the other really...
By their lack of patience all their problems are exacerbated. - The main impact of their impulsiveness and their self-condemnation is encouraged...
Normal is as much a myth as Santa Claus and Easter Bunny. - What works best for you? - What is best for you? - And best for your family? - The task is to find out what you feel and your family...
You have while you were growing up - very often found that you were not taken seriously...
You tend to withdraw too quickly and believe - that your feelings are not worth anything...
You believe every day anew in yourself. - If you do day after day, you can change any bad habit...
The adults did not say what they thought - nor did they mean what they said (see lies and deception, etc. - d.48)... (J. G. Woititz)
Golden Snow
“A lot of the above can map out my life ... so many children go through this ... You have seen your parents do not laugh and make jokes and nonsense - Life was a very serious and annoying issue - It just was not fun to have fun (except as a student in Tübingen, see 1970-74 etc. - d.48). In your house was no place for it - You gave it up - It was not possible”…
Golden Snow
“The best years of my life were before I was five ... My Mother was a single mom with seven children to bring up ... we lived on a reserve ... each day was filled with laughter and learning ... I learned more in the first five short years of my life then I did for years later ... we played games together had fires at night and sang and danced ... life was sweet ... my next father was an alcoholic, abuse both physical and mental filled my days .... we lived a living hell ... dali48 to live in a family without lots of love and laughter leaves the children with sad hearts and wills taken ... fear of everything and mistrusting everyone .... love of parents is important in early life ... our health is better and out look on life ... so much needed blogstop dali48 ... again I thank you for your kindness and caring ...”
Reliability and Alcoholism and Symptoms etc. by dali48
dali48 and visiting and photographing his parents' former house in Neustetter street in SHA-Steinbach etc. Interpretation of dali48
Certain reliability is appropriate when it comes to the relationship with a child that is going through a particularly difficult stage of development - or the relationship with a person who is ill - and cannot give what it has otherwise given… (J. G. Woititz)
People, who do not deserve our reliability, are often very critical with us. - They spend much time trying to tell us, all what is wrong etc.
For me it's important to hear what someone did last week (see in the past, etc. - d.48), instead that he tells me - what he intends to do tonight (see in the future, etc. - d.48)...
Whenever you think you need to put something immediately into action, - you should recognize it as a wrong decision - and wondering yourself at the same moment, what would be the consequences - if you did it...
The alcoholic person lies mostly in the form of promises - which he does not respect...
Even the child doesn’t want to see the truth. - Nobody wants it...
Meeting the reality is, however, return to health - If your children need not hide feelings it reduces their load...
Feelings are not right or wrong. - They simply exist...
It's okay to be angry - but it is wrong to behave destructively...
The anger that one turns inward - is causing stomach problems, depression and all sorts of other problems...
Dinner, bedtime and homework are subject to a fixed schedule...
By unreliability, children are disoriented and lose the sense of who they are - You cannot feel comfortable in your skin when you never know what will happen the next day...
Children of alcoholics feel helpless. - Life is a burden to them...
We grow strong in the hard times, - and not in the easy ones...
Alcoholism symptoms:
Excessive dependence and the inability to express emotions, - low frustration tolerance, emotional immaturity, a high level of anxiety in interpersonal relationships, low self-esteem, pomposity, feelings of isolation, perfectionism, ambivalence to authority, feelings of guilt…
Reaction of the family:
Denial, taking in protection, compassion, concern for the drinker, shame, avoidance of situations in which alcohol is drunk, change of position in relationship, dominance, assumption of power, self-employment, guilt, obsession, constant worry, fear, lying, confused, sexual problems, anger, lethargy, hopelessness, self-pity, remorse, and despair... (J. G. Woititz)
Golden Snow I have seen the damage that can be caused by some who treat their ill parent or spouse with much critical abuse , almost like hate , telling them that they cannot not take much more ... the person that is sick is not at blame ... being critical is never the answer ... I try and place myself in the others shoes and look through their eyes and treat them as I would like to be treated ... have cried many times seeing abuse like this...
Golden Snow
I love to listen to people tell me what they did in their lives rather then what they wish to do ... I see stories unfold and wonderful thoughts and feeling that light up their faces ... almost like being with them ... nothing like an evening in front of a little fire with stores and adventure ... this is a wonderful post dali48 ... a little on a big subject Alcoholism is a family and life ruining experience ... I have a beautiful son inside a clouded life of alcoholism ...started at young age ... very bad experience in his life and secretly drank ... so much misery for his family and himself ... and I know what is inside of this young man , he is kind and beautiful ... he has robbed himself and family of a great family life ... although he is quite and kind the drinking is not good …
dali48 and writing and cycling and photographing in Wickrath since 6/2010 etc.
https://www.facebook.com/100000452958045/videos/372377540163904/
dali48 and menaced private teaching (since 1989) and writing books & cycling & photographing in Erkrath till 5/2010.
dali48 and playing chess and stopping smoking as a sports student in Tübingen in the 70s etc.
Each day is our whole life - from sunrise to sunset etc… (dali48)
21.06.2023 - I didn't see a butterfly yet in Wickrath this year ... (dali48)
I'm neither right nor left, see Salvador Dali in this context - I'm only dali48
Psychology says, Trust your intuition. It never lies.
see dali48 & FGYO / SIT, language teacher, 1975/76 in Tübingen and Lenzkirch (Black Forest), and wandering in the morning, and in Erkrath (8/1983-5/2010) cooking houseman and teaching in the afternoon, on Saturdays & compact courses during holidays etc.
see dali48 and walking and cycling etc. - and without own car in Erkrath since 2004 - and without driving in Wickrath since 6/2010 etc.
"It takes few words to express the essential" - Paul Éluard
"One’s destination is never a place, but a new way of seeing things." ... (H. Miller)
"The past is pain, the future uncertainty. The present is all we have" ... (Tao Wong)
„Wer immer die Wahrheit sagt, kann sich ein schlechtes Gedächtnis leisten.“ (F. Sulzer
)
"Everything you love will probably be lost, but in the end, love will return in another way." (F. Kafka)
see dali48 and bees and CCD and neonics since ca. 2000 etc.
In "love" are the beginning and the climax - the most beautiful periods etc... (dali48)
"Time spent with cats is never wasted." (S. Freud)
Why not use bio-methane, hydrogen, bio heating oil, e-heating oil - instead of banning oil and gas heating etc. (dali48)
"Only the present moment counts, even when the subject is the past." (R. D. Brinkmann)
"Non-sexual intimacy is therapeutic. Deep conversations, healthy silence, a unique joke from an old memory, similar interests; beautiful stuff." (@ML_Philosophy
)
see dali48 and “If the Trees disappeared off the face of the earth - mankind would only have little left to live healthy,” see e.g. Amazonas forest, Indonesia etc, see e.g. @CGShanghaiAir Shanghai - 2023-03-06 4PM - PM2.5 - 103 AQI - Unhealthy for Sensitive Groups ... etc.
see dali48 and trees & photo synthesis and fresh air and health and cooling and biodiversity etc.
Why not recreate lost Wetlands by desalinated sea water? ... (dali48)
"Half of the money for arms should go as reparation to "flora & fauna" & UBI ,,, (dali48)e money for arms
"Getting older is realizing putting yourself first isn’t selfish, it’s necessary" (@meauhlback
)
"Some people go through our lives to teach us not to be like them." ( Lev Tolstoy)
"is it ethical to hoard bread when families are starving?" (@existentialcoms
)"The goal isn’t money, the goal is to spend your days as you wish." (@ML_Philosophy
)“Give a child a good birth (if at all possible, no drugs to the mother)=1 and a good first three years, especially a good first three months, and a major part of the job of child rearing is done.” ― Arthur Janov, The Biology of Love"Be teachable. You’re not always right." (@ML_Philosophy)
"The tombstone of capitalism will later say: too much was not enough." (Volker Pispers)
see dali48 and environmental disasters & @sara_s_2020 & #Tiredearth & Manila Slum (Philippines) & Creek etc.
»Auf dem Grabstein (der Erde; d. Red.) könnte stehen: Jeder wollte das Beste – für sich.« (Siegfried Lenz)
"Smiling mobilizes 15 muscles, but sulking requires 40. Rest: smile!" (Christophe André)
"Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. And today? Today is a gift that"s why they call it the present." - (@TheWordicle)
"When you realize how precious and fragile life is, it changes your whole perspective." (Ryan O’Donnell)
"A kind word can warm up to three months of winter" - Japanese proverb
"It’s better to walk alone than with a crowd going in the wrong direction." (@wise_chimp)
"It is far better to be alone, than to be in bad company." (@PsychologyDose_)
"The truth is not always beautiful, nor beautiful words the truth." - Lao Tzu
"... We get old too soon, and wise too late." (@_AhmadHijazi)
"Nothing in the world is worth turning away from what we love" - Albert Camus
I am allowed to say NO to others and YES to myself." (@Lenka49044040)
"You can only live forwards, understand life only backwards." (Søren Kierkegaard)
"Write your life - Or they'll wait till you're dead to write the lie" ... (@spectraspeaks)
see "Remove the idea that anybody else is responsible for your misery and suffering; that somebody can give meaning to your life. Accept that you are alone, born alone (premature birth, 7 months etc. - d.48), and you will die alone" ... (Osho)
"Respect for life - should be the only religion in the world!" ... (Osho)
"Religion is a journey inside - and meditation is the way there" ... (Osho)
"Zen finds religion in the daily activities." (I-tuan)
see
see dali48 and nervous breakdown & psychotherapy (1 year) in Tübingen in 1974 and the ontogenetic & phyloggenetic unconscious etc.
see dali48 and dreaming & visions, see e.g. The 2004 Indian Ocean earthquake & tsunami etc, see Golden G. Snow "I journey I know it's true. I've seen the future too. In my "journey", things are not good. So much of the earth will be ... soon. I have no more to say."), and NDE and reincarnation and reading & writing ...
see scott_hurst retweeted by dali48 "If all the atheists left the USA, it would lose 93% of the National Academy of Sciences but less than 1% of the prison population" …
Spelt helps: fatigue, loss of energy, heart problems etc. (St Hilda)
@dali48
I found this dairy of great interest and enjoyed the journey ... it is filled with well written information that covers all age groups, from history to health both in body and mind ... the why's and where's are answered in complete ... thanks dali48 for sharing ...
Thank you for sharing. Your braveness to fight illness has inspired me to face life in a different way dali48. I love the concept of living in the moment and breathing into it. This has improved my health both in body and mind.
Deutsch Ausgabe | von 48 Dali | 28. Dezember 2009
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dali48 and writing books and cycling and photographing etc...
see dali48 and warning of neo-fascism since 1989 in Erkrath etc. - instead of Ecology & Health etc. - Uncontrolled capitalism (without UBI & wealth tax) produces evil as bees produce honey, see Instead of €100 billion for armaments - €50 billion for #ClimateEmergency 2022 & UBI etc.
see @nur_Dagmar / ntv: "Global #militaryspending exceeds for the first time 2 TRILLION dollars" (2022) - instead of 1 trillion for #ClimateEmergency 2022 and basic income etc. (dali48)
see dali48 & "The already uninhabitable Earth. Today (3.7.23), Zabol in Iran recorded the highest temperature on Earth at 49.6C" (@PGDynes), see e.g. https://aljazeera.com/news/2023/6/30/out-of-time-temperature-records-topple-around-the-world, & #ClimateEmergency 2022 instead of enough clean air (see e.g. Shanghai Air etc.) & drinking water (see desalination of sea water since ca. 2000), enough trees & fish, #ZeroHunger, solar & wind energy since the 70s & UBI since 2008 & biodiversity & health & no inflation, heat waves, wars etc. see dali48 & Heatwaves in #Europe, see #IPCC #ClimateReport, see #ClimateEmergency 2022 (https://insideclimatenews.org/.../cold-weather-polar.../ via , cold spells, #heatwave #Pakistan & #India 62°C/143°F, #Copernicus #Sentinel3 LST, dryness, #Wildfires in US & Canada, 'gigafires' & air pollution (Australia, Amazonas (#amazon #brasilien #luigicani #bäume #natur #pflanzen #säen), California, South Europe, South America, etc), floods, hurricanes, cyclones etc. since ca. 2000, loss of home in Africa, Southeast Asia & Pacific etc. - despite Club of Rome in the 70s, Copenhagen 2009, Paris 2015, Coronavirus 2020, #EarthOvershootDay 2021, #COP26, mass extinction, ecocide (https://www.stopecocide.earth/.../ecocide-due-to-biomass...), "ethnic cleansing", factory farming & zoonoses, racing in the wrong direction, see Instead of €100 billion for armaments - €50 billion for #ClimateEmergency and basic income etc. (dali48), see https://www.boell.de/.../20/wettrennen-die-falsche-richtung, see #SaveTibetSaveThePlanet, see Indigenous Climate Action etc. - instead of clean air & drinking water, enough trees & fish, #ZeroHunger, solar & wind energy & Basic Income (see https://eusignday.eu) & biodiversity & health & cures instead of inflation and war etc. War crimes, see e.g. Ukraine etc. - and environmental crimes, see e.g. Kuwait, 50 million tires burn etc. - should be documented & punished by the UNO etc... (dali48)
see History & Genocide of Minorities & Scapegoats - instead of @UNHumanRights and Protection of #environmentdefenders & reparation for natives etc... (dali48)
Don't see swallows here in Wickrath (2018) as before at Lake Unterbach where they were deeply flying before the rain, and were nearly touching my head till 2010... (dali48)
see dali48 and Concerning Chernobyl 1986, see sohub.io/uo63, see sohub.io/st6t, and Fukushima 2011 - see http://www.mdr.de/.../video-2362_zc-b45e8c8c_zs-6da2f47c... - see Comparison of the Chernobyl and Fukushima nuclear accidentshttps://en.wikipedia.org › wiki › Comparison_of_the_C... The following table compares the nuclear accidents at the Chernobyl (1986) and Fukushima Daiichi (2011) nuclear power plants, the only INES level 7 nuclear ... Survivors of nuclear testing should get reparation by the UN etc. (dali48)
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